Tag Archive for: love

Argument Addiction & Chemistry Lies

Chemistry is a LIAR

Today’s episode is all about Identifying past relationship patterns is crucial to restructuring your dating strategy to find success. 

DATING DISH (1:50)

Does your wedding budget predict your chances at divorce?

According to Novi Money, if you spend $1000 or less, you are more likely to get divorced within 10 years. Damona and Producer Leah discuss.

#NationalCourtshipDay 

Do you remember the Duggars? Apparently they’re trying to make #NationalCourtshipDay happen. What is the difference between courtship and dating?

Demi Moore spills the tea on her marriage with Ashton Kutcher

Should he respond? Damona and Producer Leah break it down.

Argument & Chemistry Addiction (15:00)

Silent but Deadly Relationship Killers

We’ve said it many times but will say it again: Identifying past relationship patterns is crucial to restructuring your dating strategy to find success.

In Damona’s own personal dating journey, she had to overcome an addiction

I had an addiction to “chemistry.” She LOVED that serotonin rush she got from a new connection and equated conflict with “passion.” But none of these relationships worked.

As it turns out, this is really common. Dr. Phillip Lee, notable marital therapist and co-head of the Cornell Medical Center, joins us today to break it down.

According to his new book, Argument Addiction, co-authored with his wife, our biological predisposition to chemistry addiction can make stable relationships difficult.

But there is a solution! Drs. Lee and Rudolph have unlocked the secrets to successful relationships through their extensive research. We cover:

  • What is Argument Addiction?
  • Chemistry is a LIAR
  • Chemistry hangovers (don’t blame the tequila!)
  • How to know when to call it quits
  • The difference between Happy Couples and Struggling Couples

Get your copy of Argument Addiction and be sure to follow Drs. Lee and Phillip on Twitter (@ArgumentBook) and Instragram (@ArgumentAddictionBook)

TECHNICALLY DATING (30:20)

Submit your questions Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook and hear our answers live on the show! Here’s what our listeners asked about this week:

  • What does it mean to be too picky in dating?
  • Is your man really your man if he’s still on dating apps?

Dating Fatigue & Dumbing it Down

Have you ever wanted to give up on dating?

Today’s episode is all about dating fatigue and finding purpose in dating with author, Kacie Main!

DATING DISH (2:30)

Do ladies dumb themselves down to date?

According to Mirror UK new study shows that 37% of women feel that men are intimidated by their intellect. Damona and Kacie have thoughts.

One trick to get a second date

Daily Mail reports that saying your dates name multiple times may be the key to getting a second date.

Plenty of Fish has banned filtered photos! 

What exactly does this mean? Damona and Kacie break it down.

A Drastic Solution to Dating Fatigue

Giving Up Men for Lent & Finding Purpose in Dating

We’ve talked about dating fatigue on Dates & Mates in the past, but have you ever been so burnt out on it that you decided to quit the dating game entirely?

Kacie Main did. In 2017, she got so burnt out on searching for love after a string of questionable decisions, that she decided to hit the reset button and give up men for lent (about 40 days.)

A little drastic, maybe?

Maybe not, it turns out! I loved hearing about Kacie’s journey from what she calls “dating desperation” to really understanding and finding her purpose in dating.

We go in-depth on dating fatigue and also cover:

  • Does dating occupy too much of your mental space?
  • Are you the victim or the villain of your dating life?
  • Should men be threatened by this? 
  • Also consider taking a break from alcohol, baby showers, and friends of the opposite sex. (wait, baby showers???)

You can find Kacie at kaciemain.com! Make sure to get a copy of her book “I Gave Up Men For Lent: The story of a jaded, hopelessly romantic, health-conscious party girl’s search for meaning” on Amazon!

TECHNICALLY DATING

Submit your questions Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook and hear our answers live on the show! Here’s what our listeners asked about this week:

  • How to know if they’re telling you the truth on dating apps?
  • What to do when you get really aggressive comments about your body on dating apps?
  • How to pick up a dating app convo if it’s gone cold?

Good News You Can Use!

Can I share some good news with you?

The Dates & Mates Community is finding TRUE LOVE
It’s been a great month

I don’t like to brag, but I’m giving myself a pat on the back this month. TWO Dates & Mates couples are on their journey to happily ever after!If you watched my tv show, A Question of Love on A+E Networks, you know that we put 3 relationships to the test and helped them explore the insecurities that might be hurting their relationship.

During this time, Nicky was really open and honest about the trust issues she had with men. For her entire life, she watched men leave her grandmother, mother, and aunts.

She was convinced that she would not break the pattern. All of these past disappointments almost led her to lose Jamie, the man that genuinely wanted to prove that he was going to be around forever.

Her trust issues almost killed their relationship! Here’s a short peek at their relationship journey!

Nicky & Jamie’s Relationship Journey on FYI’s A Question of Love from Damona on Vimeo.

I’m so happy for Nicky and Jamie! They were wonderful to work with on the show and I wish them a lifetime of love and happiness!

Also CONGRATS TO ALICE AND HER BAE!

Broadening your horizons really works!

Alice is a long-time listener of Dates & Mates and she’s applied some advice that I gave on the show to make a match:

Are you ready for your love story to begin?

In a few weeks I’ll be launching a new and improved version of my 30 Day Dating Playbook and since you’re part of my VIP community, I’d like to give you access to get EARLY ACCESS the to join the program before registration opens up to the general public. I’ll also through in a special VIP discount for you too.

In a nutshell, The 30 Day Dating Playbook is 30 days of video, audio, tutorials and quick start tips that you can start using right away! You’ll discover things like:

  • The #1 most important quality that attracts the opposite sex
  • What’s gone wrong in your past relationships and how to fix that in the future
  • How to actually enjoy dating and make meaningful connections

If you want into the VIP Early Access list, all you have to do is click this link and look out for an email from me with registration details in a couple weeks!

CLICK HERE!

Body Confidence & Mojo Makeover

WOULD DATING BE EASIER IF WE WERE MORE BODY CONFIDENT?

Is it time you got your mojo back?

We get REAL on Dates & Mates this week. Damona says, “Some days I don’t feel great about my body. Maybe you can relate? But I figured that if I opened up and faced my true feelings about my body image, it might help you and I become more body positive together.”

We sat down with Dana B Meyers, the Queen of Mojo Makeovers, and Laurie DiBiasio, CEO of Babe You Lingerie, to talk about body confidence and self love.

This episode is all about:

  • Finding body confidence at every life stage or size
  • Building sensuality with another person
  • Spicing up your Love Life (don’t worry, it doesn’t get graphic and uncomfortable)

Here’s the rundown:

Damona’s Story (1:30)

Body Positivity is hard at any age

Your partner wants you to love your body as much as they do (7:30)

Stop deflecting compliments! (8:30)

Dana’s method to transforming NEGATIVE BODY BANTER into a SEXY SELF LOVE AFFIRMATION (9:45)

“If I just lost 10 pounds, I will find love” (16:00)

Building sensuality with another person (19:00)

Especially if you’ve been out of the game for a while or if you and your partner need to spice it up

Choose Babe You! With Laurie DiBiasio (33:00)

Why Lingerie should be visible (34:00)

The hourglass shape has historically been the most desirable shape (36:00)

Do things change when you see someone in a more intimate situation for the first time? (38:00)

We like feeling beautiful – not just for other people! (43:00)

DATES & MATES DEALS: #GETPAID

Get PAID to listen to podcasts through PODCOIN! Get 300 podcoin now by using the code DatesAndMates

EZ Dating & How Men Fall In Love

LADIES: IT’S TIME TO START DATING LIKE A MAN

Right now, women have all the power online – at least that’s how EZ Dating Coach, Mike Goldstein sees it. 

Here’s the rundown:

DATING DISH (2:30)

How to tell if you’re dating a cheater

According to Dr. Lurve (LOL), cheaters have 3 very specific personality traits. Damona and Mike break it down.\

What The Weeknd’s breakup with Bella Hadid tell us about love today

Is modern love dead? Damona and Mike have thoughts.

The latest dating trend among Ivy League students

The newest study on love amongst these Ivy League undergrads is raising some eyebrows – mainly Damona’s and Mike’s.

YOU have all the power (19:00)

Is dating a quantity over quality game?

Mike Goldstein, tells us that the tides have turned and explains why women are in control in today’s online dating climate.

As dating coaches, we often see two typical behavior patterns in our clients:

1) Men go for quantity. They don’t do much research upfront about their matches and wait later on in the process to weed out potential partners.

2) Women look for quality. We like to make sure that each match is going to be worth our time.

Mike and I had a GREAT debate on his special formula to get women in a masculine dating mindset. This episode might actually BLOW YOUR MIND.

We talk:

  • How men fall in love
  • Mike’s special formula to get women dating in a masculine mindset
  • How women control the pace of a relationship
  • Don’t discard the guys who fall in love too fast, keep them around
  • And so much more!

Find Mike at EZdatingcoach.com and on YouTube! Make sure to get his FREE GIFT – A guide on how to text men during the day here!

TECHNICALLY DATING (40:16)

Submit your questions Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook and hear our answers live on the show! Here’s what our listeners asked about this week:

  • How can you find love if you’ve never had ANY contact with the opposite sex?
  • Is it impossible to find love over 50?
  • Is it too soon to date after a breakup?

DATES & MATES DEALS: #GETPAID

Get PAID to listen to podcasts through PODCOIN! Get 300 podcoin now by using the code DatesAndMates

BONUS: Singles in America

The Feminist Dating Revolution is HERE

Surprise! We dropped a new bonus episode to break down Match’s 2019 Singles In America Study.

Here are some important takeaways:

This is the best time in history for a woman in love (3:00)

Did Me Too make dating more challenging? (4:00)

The stats say: men want women need to initiate more (5:45)

What women HAVE to do to prove they are an equal partner (6:30)

Master Class: First Dates

SUMMER LOVE

Lovers, it’s the first official week of summer! Welcome to the first official episode of the Dates & Mates Summer Love Series.

The topic this week? First Dates.

First dates are the foundation of every great relationship. The tone and the rules you set at the beginning will follow you into the relationship or squash the potential for one to develop. In this master class, Damona tells you how to plan the perfect first date. Here’s the rundown:

Why are first dates so important? (1:30)

Should I google my date before I go? (2:00)

The Phone Call (4:00)

What should wear on a first date? (8:00)

What’s a good thing to do on a first date? (13:00)

How long should a first date be? (16:00)

7 Date Ideas BETTER THAN A DINNER DATE (21:00)

STILL HAVE QUESTIONS?

Get Damona’s First Date Starter Kit. You get advice on:

  • The one thing you should ALWAYS always ALWAYS  do before a first date.
  • How to ensure a second date if you like the person you’re on a first date with
  • And conversation tips to make sure it never falls flat or feels boring – crucial first date advice
  • It also has an audio program that shows you 7 different ways to make a match and how to maximize their effectiveness
  • This is perfect for anyone who feels like they’re burnt out on dating apps and need new ways to meet people
  • Or if you feel like you’re doing everything you can to make a match but it’s simply not working
  • This concise program is packed with actionable advice and in it I will teach you all the steps that I’ve used with my clients over the last 13 years to bring them more dates, and better quality dates
  • And all the crucial steps you need to take before, during, and after to set yourself up for dating success.
  • Do all the people you like on a first date never seem to call again?
  • Do you find yourself getting tongue-tied or overwhelmed on a first date?
  • Are you bored with your first dates and feeling like you’re running out of options?

Get your First Date Starter Kit at FirstDateStarterKit.Com

 

Self Love & Vulnerability

Love Yourself First

Have you ever heard the phrase, “You have to love yourself before you can love someone else”?

If you remember a few episodes ago titled “Marriage Boot Camp & Bad Advice,” Dr. V’s opinion was that you can’t love yourself in the same way that your partner would love you. Which is true.

BUT it got us thinking: there is some value in being able to understand yourself and take care of yourself in order to be more prepared for a healthier relationship. We dedicated this episode to understanding self love as it relates to dating with Jonathon Aslay. Here’s the rundown:

 

D’S DATING DISH

Wendy Williams is dating after filing for divorce

The divorce has finally happened! Should Wendy be dating already after her divorce? Damona and Jonathon have thoughts.

A new way to teach millennials how to date

CNN reports that South Korea is teaching university students how to date through a “Gender and Culture” class. Is this the most effective way to teach dating? Damona breaks it down.

Match announces a new service, a one-on-one phone call with an expert dating coach

Match is personalizing the world of online dating! What does this mean for you?

GO LOVE YOURSELF

Jonathon is America’s leading Midlife relationships expert and he has just published a fantastic guide to self love as it relates to dating called, “What the Heck is Self Love Anyway?”

Self love is an antidote to potential chaos,” Jonathon explains.

Chaos in your life is going to come in a variety of forms – whether it’s a relationship transition, job stress, family stress, etc.

“You have to learn to take care of yourself before you take care of anyone else,” Jonathon explains. A good self love and personal development practice will help you be ready for your next relationship.

In this episode, Jonathon explains:

  • How to allow yourself to feel your feelings
  • How to begin a daily personal development practice
  • How to “Shift away from the mundane and fill your own cup with love.”

Get Jonathon’s book today!

TECHNICALLY DATING

Submit your questions Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook and hear our answers live on the show! Here’s what our listeners asked about this week:

  • How to be vulnerable again in a relationship?
  • Why not talk about politics, religion, and money on a first date?
  • How do you get motivated to date again?

GETTING GLAMMED UP FOR A DATE?

Have a hot date this weekend or another event that you want to glam it up for? Let Glamsquad help you out with Damona’s code! If you’re new to Glamsquad you can get $20 off your first service with my special code Damona20.

Intimacy for Men & Rebel Love: Bonus Episode

“Y’ALL TALK?”

This holiday season, let’s take some time to work on our emotional intimacy. As we know this can be a little harder for men and we want to give you all the best tools to set you up for lasting and clear communication. This week, Damona sat down with Dr. Chris Donaghue, a psychotherapist, a sex therapist, and host of Loveline’s “The Amber Rose Show with Dr. Chris” for a special bonus episode. We talked about A LOT. Here’s the rundown:

How can we improve communication over the holidays? (1:17)

Prepare to have your mind blown: The first step to better communication is SELF CARE. Don’t see the connection? Dr. Chris breaks it down.

How do we carve out the time for emotional and sexual intimacy during the holidays?(2:30)

Does Feminism have benefits for men? (3:10)

THREE MUST-HAVES BEFORE MARRIAGE (4:20)

December 25th is the most popular day for engagements and New Years Day is the second most popular. Whether you’re single or coupled up, Dr. Chris Donaghue, from Loveline’s “The Amber Rose Show with Dr. Chris” tells us three relationship must-haves on this week’s episode before you consider moving on to the next step. 

How much information should you give away when you first start talking? (5:20)

What dating rules should you break? (7:01)

HOW DO YOU MOVE ON AFTER BEING GHOSTED BY YOUR CO-WORKER?  (7:43)

We LOVED having Dr. Chris on the show this week! Be sure to pick up his upcoming book Rebel Love: Break the Rules, Destroy Toxic Habits, and Have the Best Sex of Your Life.

STAY SEXY THIS HOLIDAY SEASON

On average people gain 2-5 lbs over the holidays. You can fight to get it off in January or you can stop the holiday heaviness before it starts by beginning a program with Beach Body on demand. Just go to DatesandMates.com and click the Beach Body Banner to get started.

The Power of Positivity & Office Crush

Our guest co-host this week was Evin Rose Lipman. Stuck in a corporate sales job in her 20s, Evin realized that she was trapped in a routine and needed to get her groove and inner light back. With the help of friends and loved ones, Evin moved to California and became a life coach, hoping to bring others joy and help them establish and nurture meaningful and authentic personal relationships. Now a personal coach, the host of gatherings for women in LA, and a leader of a passionate online community, we talked to Evin about the power of positivity in your dating life.

D’S DATING DISH (17:26)

Users revolt against OKCupid name-change update

OKCupid recently announced an initiative to get their users to identify themselves with something other than a screen name. It did not go over well. While OKCupid thought it would lead to an increased sense of authenticity, users were wary about having identifying information attached to the dating service’s extensive questionnaire. OKCupid is rapidly backpedaling, saying that a “name” only needs to consist of a minimum of two letters, but there is still trouble in the ranks. You can read more via Salon here.

The most popular dating day of the year

The most popular dating day of the year is right around the corner! Right around 9 PM EST on Sunday, January 8th, Match.com predicts seeing a 104% increase in users for 48 hours. If you’re thinking of getting back into the game in 2018, you’ve got a few days to get yourself together! You can read more via the Chicago Tribune here.

The first celebrity engagement of 2018

Paris Hilton got hitched on New Year’s Day, kicking off what’s sure to be another exciting year for celebrity matchmaking. Boyfriend Chris Zylka proposed while the pair we’re on a skiing trip in Aspen. As Paris would say, “That’s hot!” Best of luck to the new couple. You can read more via Hello! Magazine here.

TECHNICALLY DATING (30:30)

We pull the best questions posted on The Textpert App and BlackPeopleMeet.com, including:

  • How to get over an office crush
  • How to handle a boring texter
  • What to do if your boyfriend won’t give you his social media passwords

And many more . . .

DATING DOT DOT DOT (46:49)

We got Evin’s lightning-fast love advice in another rapid-fire rendition of Dating Dot Dot Dot, this time with new questions!

The worst pickup line ever is ________
The best place to go on a first date is ________
The sexiest thing about a woman is __________
The sexiest thing about a man is _________
The most important thing for a relationship to last is __________

DAMONA’S DIATRIBE (48:36)

It’s been awhile since Damona got in the hot seat, but she had something to get off her chest on this week’s episode. In her crosshairs this time around are those who have a vision, but not a solidified plan. Turn your ideas into a reality and listen to Damona’s Diatribe for a little pep talk.

GETTING MARRIED?

Get a $50 credit when you begin your wedding registry at Zola.com/dates