Drew’s Love Bug: Decoding Dating Apps

In this segment on The Drew Barrymore Show, Damona addresses the dating app worries of three women looking for love. Here’s a sneak peek:

🤔 Should I play it cool with my dates even though I want something serious?

🤔 If I’m the woman, how aggressively should I be in pursuing my dates?

🤔 I like to do an in-depth search on the people I date – should I dial it back? How much is too much?

 

Curious to hear Damona’s answers? Check out the full segment below…

Drew’s Love Bug: Dating Advice for Singles in Need

Damona answers burning questions from singles calling into The Drew Barrymore Show, including:

✨ How do I move forward with initiating the first call or virtual date without making it weird?

✨ How can I get back into the dating game after a recent heartbreak or rejection?

 

Curious to hear Damona’s answers? Check out the full segment below…

NYT: 4 Ways to Ring in the New Year at Home

Few will miss saying goodbye to 2020, though most people will be celebrating the start of a new, and hopefully, a better year in a more subdued way because of the coronavirus pandemic.

Your homebound New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day can still be romantic, nostalgic, and filled with traditions — old and new. Here are four creative and unexpectedly connective options to consider as you rethink your 2021 corona countdown.

Read the article here to check out Damona’s tips!

NYT: How to Revisit Your First Date

Your relationship might be sorely in need of attention. Why not recreate the special day that sparked it, with an enhancement or three?

Rebooting your romance and reigniting that spark are more important than you think, especially now. One way to reconnect with your partner is to revisit your first date. This may sound silly, but the payoff is surprisingly rewarding.

Click here to read Damona’s suggestions, along with other love experts…

Dear Damona: Dating outside your own race

L.A. love coach Damona Hoffman tackles dating and relationship questions on her weekly podcast, “Dates & Mates.” She said she receives many topical, thought-provoking relationship questions, but none has ever struck a chord with listeners like this one:

Dear Damona: Am I racist if I don’t want to date outside my race?

While being #woke is currently trending on Twitter as I write this, for the last 15 years I’ve contemplated the relationship between race and romance and coached my clients to be “race-open” when they date, because it expands our view of the world and increases your odds of meeting someone special. This practice has been met with many objections along the way.

The first objection I hear when I suggest this: “But Damona, isn’t it my choice who I date?”

Of course, you have freedom in your dating choices, yet there are systemic causes and effects to your decision that are worth examining.

Read the rest of Damona’s answer HERE!

NYT: Damona shares her ‘I Love You’ story

The words “I love you,” spoken for the first time, are milestones that let you know where a romantic relationship stands.

In one memorable “Seinfeld” episode, Jerry asks George if he told his girlfriend he loved her. “Oh, I had no choice,” he replied. “She squeezed it out of me! She’d tell me she loved me. All right, at first, I just look at her. I’d go, ‘Oh, really?’ or ‘Boy, that’s, that’s something.’ But eventually you have to come back with ‘Well, I love you.’ You know, you can only hold out for so long!”

Men and women tend to say “I love you” at different times in a relationship. In our own romantic research, 10 couples shared how their stories played out.

Read Seth & Damona’s FULL origin story here!

LA Times: Dear Damona

L.A. love coach Damona Hoffman tackles dating and relationship questions on her weekly podcast, “Dates & Mates.” Here, she shares answers to the questions she’s getting about love in the time of coronavirus:

  • I’ve been chatting with someone on a dating app for a few weeks. What is the best way to move things to the next level since we can’t meet in person?
  • I miss my ex and I’ve been tempted to reach out and check on him. Good idea?
  • I love my wife, but her quirks are driving me up the wall right now. Like why does she load the dishwasher like that? Should I say something or bite my tongue?

Read Damona’s answers HERE!

Wash Post: Left Disney to become a Taxidermist?

If you know the story of how I came to be a dating coach – you know that I have a soft spot for entrepreneurs who strike out on their own to pursue their passion.

Allis Markham of Prey Taxidermy is so magnificent and inspiring! I’m so honored to share her story for the Washington Post on newsstands this Sunday.

Here’s a sneak peek:

She left her social media job to take up taxidermy. Now her work is on TV.

You never forget your first deer, especially when it took several days to skin, stuff and dye the fur pink. It was 2013 and Allis Markham was working as a director of social media strategy at Disney in the Los Angeles area when she decided to spend two weeks in Montana to learn the art of taxidermy. At the time, she was interested in creating avant-garde pieces that merged her love of wildlife with her passion for art, hence the pink deer.

She went on to volunteer at the Natural History Museum of Los Angeles and studied under Tim Bovard, the museum’s head taxidermist. “I volunteered so long I think they were embarrassed to not pay me anymore,” Markham remembers. Though she says she would have paid them for the experience, she officially became part of the team after a year of apprenticeship. Her time there shifted her focus from “rogue taxidermy” to creating works that were true to their natural state. (She gave the pink deer away.)

Continue Reading here!

Shondaland: Tired of an inbox full of “hey”?

Damona is featured here in Shondaland for a profile makeover piece, in which she discloses how the 3 C’s can spark more engagement with your dating profile. Here’s a sneak peek:

“THE DATER: Colleen, 25, a wholesale manager for a beauty brand based in the South

For five-plus years, Colleen has had an on-again, off-again relationship with the standard trio of dating apps: Hinge, Bumble, Tinder. So far, she says most of her matches have felt like “a waste of time.” Her inbox is stacked with “Hey” after “Hey” from bland guys with whom she has zero chemistry, and who rarely engage her in conversations about her own interests. Among her lengthy list of duds is the Atlanta Falcons player who commented on her photo with a tired pick-up line (that, at least, resulted in an entertaining screenshot for her friends) and the creepy guy who claimed to coincidentally “run into her” one night while she was out with friends and proceeded to follow her around for the evening.

THE EXPERT: Damona Hoffman

Hoffman jokes that she’s been coaching online daters “since they used to do profiles on stone tablets.” In addition to one on one coaching, Hoffman frequently does public speaking engagements on the subject, offers an online course, and hosts a weekly podcast called Dates & Mates. She thinks of dating profiles as a form of storytelling, and helps clients craft “narratives” designed to engage exactly the people they’re hoping to meet, as opposed to profiles that could appeal to anyone. “You could get a lot of messages, but if they’re a lot of the wrong messages, or you’re not going on dates with the right kind of people, then it feels exhausting, frustrating and overwhelming,” Hoffman says.

We asked Hoffman to review Colleen’s profile and come up with actionable tips that will help this “meh” dater find an authentic connection.”

Click here to read Damona’s tips!

Hello Giggles: How to talk to your partner about sex

Damona spoke with Ashley Uzer at Hello Giggles about communication and sex. A big takeaway – your partner is not a mind reader! Be open with them about what you need (especially when it comes to kinky sex).

“Start small”

You probably don’t pull out all your sexual stops on the first date, right? Same theory goes for rolling out your toolkit of kinky fantasies.

“Start with mentioning something that turns you on and then ask him how he feels about it, and if it’s something he’d be up for trying,” suggests Hoffman. “You don’t want to bring all 50 shades out the first time you have sex.”

Read the rest of Damona’s advice HERE!

Date Lab: Are drinking habits a deal-breaker?

This week, Damona covered a date that was set up by The Washington Post Date Lab!

Kate Bohan describes the men she has dated in the past as “good humans” who were just not right for her. The 32-year-old California native who handles billing for a study-abroad provider is seeking someone “genuine, handsome, curious and kind who believes that humanity is all connected.” The Date Lab team set her up with Alex Reading, 28, a George Washington University graduate student studying philosophy and social policy.

Kate says she doesn’t embarrass easily. But she described the feeling of first meeting Alex at Ris in the West End and taking the required photos as “awkward prom.” To break the ice, Kate suggested they order a drink, then noticed an uncomfortable look on Alex’s face. “Oh, God, he doesn’t drink,” Kate immediately realized. She was right.

Click here to see if this was a deal-breaker for Kate…

Can dating apps be used for advertising?

Erin Gallagher was swiping on Bumble when a picture of her longtime crush, Blink 182 drummer Travis Barker, popped up. It seemed too good to be true but she noticed the blue check verification next to his name, so it had to be him. Erin swiped right and, to her surprise, it was a match.

Erin quickly thought of a clever introduction: “Why am I not surprised that you’re a Scorpio?”

A part of her still assumed it was a fake profile so she went into online detective mode… Then she checked his Instagram feed.

“I’m giving away festival and meet & greet passes through @bumble for our show on Saturday. If you’re in SoCal and want to hit up @backtothebeachfest (& meet me), download @bumble and find me.”

Erin had fallen for an expertly executed promotion. And she didn’t even win the passes.

What happened next? Read the rest of the story here!