Damona is featured here in Shondaland for a profile makeover piece, in which she discloses how the 3 C’s can spark more engagement with your dating profile. Here’s a sneak peek:
“THE DATER: Colleen, 25, a wholesale manager for a beauty brand based in the South
For five-plus years, Colleen has had an on-again, off-again relationship with the standard trio of dating apps: Hinge, Bumble, Tinder. So far, she says most of her matches have felt like “a waste of time.” Her inbox is stacked with “Hey” after “Hey” from bland guys with whom she has zero chemistry, and who rarely engage her in conversations about her own interests. Among her lengthy list of duds is the Atlanta Falcons player who commented on her photo with a tired pick-up line (that, at least, resulted in an entertaining screenshot for her friends) and the creepy guy who claimed to coincidentally “run into her” one night while she was out with friends and proceeded to follow her around for the evening.
THE EXPERT: Damona Hoffman
Hoffman jokes that she’s been coaching online daters “since they used to do profiles on stone tablets.” In addition to one on one coaching, Hoffman frequently does public speaking engagements on the subject, offers an online course, and hosts a weekly podcast called Dates & Mates. She thinks of dating profiles as a form of storytelling, and helps clients craft “narratives” designed to engage exactly the people they’re hoping to meet, as opposed to profiles that could appeal to anyone. “You could get a lot of messages, but if they’re a lot of the wrong messages, or you’re not going on dates with the right kind of people, then it feels exhausting, frustrating and overwhelming,” Hoffman says.
We asked Hoffman to review Colleen’s profile and come up with actionable tips that will help this “meh” dater find an authentic connection.”