The Future & Dating While Busy

BUSY BUSY BUSY

How do you make time for Slow Love when you are #bookedandbusy? Marquis Olison, writer, community organizer, and lifestyle coach, returns with his insight on the mind of the single men. We talked about A LOT today. Here’s the rundown:

D’S DATING DISH (2:55)

Marie Kondo Your Life Even More

You’ve seen Marie’s hit Netflix Series “Tidying Up with Marie Kondo”, but did you know that Marie’s method also applies to your messy love life? Damona and Marquis break it down.  

Future is Ciara’s Past

This week in things we already knew: Ciara has moved on. Here’s why Damona and Marquis think that Future has not.

Some New Pick Up Lines for 2019

So you’ve match on a dating app. Now what? Bustle released a list of suggestions to spruce up your message game. There are a few good ones on here according to Damona.

Dating While Busy (14:26)

Yes, RiRi is busy being a boss babe, BUT when she’s ready for another relationship we’ve got the how to guide on making time for a relationship when you don’t even have time for yourself. We sat down with La Presa King and Dwayne Colbert who know all about being BOOKED & BUSY. Even Damona actually learned a thing or two:

  • Where do you fit in dating
  • Treating Dating like its your job
  • Single Moms: Where are all the single Dads?
  • Men: Are they dogs or are they vultures?
  • Bad Moms & Getting our of your normal cycle
  • Making time for your marriage
  • Training your man to check in with you during the day
  • And so much more!

TECHNICALLY DATING (39:15)

Submit your questions Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook and hear our answers live on the show! Here’s what our listeners asked about this week:

  • Should you put your socials on dating apps like your millennial niece?
  • The pros and cons of dating

STAY SEXY IN 2019

Get back in shape after the holiday by beginning a program with Beach Body on demand! Just go to DatesandMates.com and click the Beach Body Banner to get started.

Dating Myths & The DM Deal

ARE YOU BEING TAKEN SERIOUSLY?

Did you know that women in the top 20% of attractiveness receive 5 times as many messages as women who are rated as “average attractiveness”? Today we welcomed Lindsey Pelas, social media influencer, model, activist, and entrepreneur to tell us the truth about your online image. Damona and Lindsey break down dating stereotypes and discuss how to be taken seriously on dating apps today no matter what your “Tinder ranking” is. Here’s the rundown:

D’S DATING DISH (2:39)

Career or a sex life? Both?

You would think that the more you work, the less you have sex, right? Wrong. According to recent studies, people who work more actually have more sex. Damona and Lindsey discuss.

The $69 Billion Dollar Man

Just when you thought the Bezos’ divorce couldn’t get any wilder, it did. Damona and Lindsey break down the newest developments.

Hollywood’s Newest Engagement

Spotted: Katherine Schwarzenegger with a FABULOUS new engagement ring from Chris Pratt. But did Chris Pratt do enough to warn Anna Faris? Damona doesn’t think so.

Avoid these dating trends in 2017

Damona and Lindsey define Cookie Jarring, Pocketing, and Prowling.

GET SERIOUS (39:18)

In today’s increasingly visual online dating environment, it can be a struggle to create a profile that is going to attract the right kind of attention. Damona hears the same problem from a lot of women: How do we get taken seriously when we match based mostly on looks? The answer: It’s not easy, but not impossible.  

We invited Lindsey Pelas into the studio to help us break it down. In addition to her successful modeling and media career, Lindsey Pelas also has an IMPRESSIVE portfolio. She has a degree, she’s an activist, she is a Instagram business early adopter, public speaker, and entrepreneur. Damona and Lindsey talked about A LOT:

  • #WomeninBusiness and Investing
  • Is it really easier to date if you’re beautiful
  • What makes you more attractive? Is it different for men?
  • Confidence and Attractiveness
  • Pick Up Artist Theory
  • Why men are mean
  • How do slide in the DMs
  • Treating your partner well
  • Trash Talking your ex
  • Is it actually harder to date in LA?
  • And so much more!
Follow Lindsey on Instagram and Twitter and be sure to listen to her funny lifestyle podcast “Eyes Up Here with Lindsey Pelas.” Also look out for her upcoming restaurant, Sugar Taco.

TECHNICALLY DATING (36:02)

Submit your questions Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook and hear our answers live on the show! Here’s what our listeners asked about this week:

  • Should you focus on school or a relationship?
  • How to deal with a flaky Tinder match

DAMONA’S DIATRIBE (39:18)

BBC Released a video calling dating apps “pathalogical” and “narcissistic.” Damona responds. 

YOU NEED A PLAN TO MEET YOUR MAN

Ladies – If you feel exhausted, frustrated, and overwhelmed with dating today, it’s time for a change. You can go about dating the way you did in 2018 but let’s face it, doing the same thing will probably get you the same results. You need a plan. You need a plan to meet your man. It’s all inside The 30 Day Dating Playbook program which is available for you now at MeetYourManin30Days.com. Get your copy today!  

 

Gender Identity & Astrology of Love

IS LOVE IN THE STARS FOR YOU THIS FALL?

Carol Allen, from Love Is In the Stars, co-hosts this week’s episode. Carol is an astrologer who steers the love lives of many women based on what is written in the stars. Today on the show, she gives us a fantastic fall love forecast and joins us to talk about gender and sexuality because she has a personal connection to this topic through a close transgender family member who she’s supported through his transition. Together with our guest panel, Damona and Carol unpack what your dating life can learn from the experiences of those who have a different sexual orientation or gender identity than you do.

D’S DATING DISH

Why are divorce rates going down?

Thanks millennials! According to Time, a recent study shows that divorce rates dropped 18% from 2008 to 2016 and this is due mostly to the lower divorce rates among millennials. Is it really all that surprising that millennials are divorcing less than generations before them? We don’t think so.

What can you learn from Gen Z daters

According to a study done by the dating app Zoosk, there are a number things that Gen Z does right when it comes to dating. Gen Zers are the least picky daters and swipe right on 33% of the matches they are presented with. How can this help you and what else can you learn from this study? We have answers.

Your childhood faves have a new relationship status!

It’s been a few weeks since former Sesame Street writer, Mark Saltzman, confirmed that Bert and Ernie are indeed a gay couple. The official Sesame Workshop says differently, however. Does it matter whether Bert and Ernie are gay? Does representation matter – even in kids programming? Or are we taking the puppet relationship dynamic too far? The discussion heats up this week.

IDENTITY, SEXUALITY, AND GENDER

Sexuality and Gender Identity: Are they fixed or fluid? How do you know if the way you’ve been living or dating might be limiting your possibility of finding true love and happiness? We sat down with Jasmine Luna and Harry Caldwell to learn more about their experience.

Jasmine Luna is your average queer, transgender, latinx witch. She is a strong advocate for her queer community, which includes work at the Trevor Project and the Los Angeles LGBT Center.

Harry Caldwell is a Jewelry Designer, Yoga Instructor, and Tantra Instructor. He has identified as Pansexual for the last 15+ years and feels compelled to share his knowledge of the energy of love with everyone he encounters in order to reduce the amount of suffering in the world.

We talked about A LOT:

  • Pansexuality, Omnisexuality, Bisexuality, Transexuality
  • Transitioning
  • What it’s like Transitioning within a relationship
  • Pronouns & Identity
  • Mixed Raced Identity & Sexuality
  • Tantra & Unifying the Masculine and Feminine Energies within us
  • Dating in Los Angeles versus other cities
  • How to maintain outgoing mentality towards dating apps
  • Hookup Culture and Pansexuality
  • Making Love & Deep Intimate Connection
  • The Trevor Project
  • Panty Hose
  • Chickens

TECHNICALLY DATING  

via GIPHY

Submit your questions Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook and hear our answers live on the show! Here’s what our listeners asked about this week:

  • Is it normal to be dating multiple people online?
  • How can you tell if they’re busy or blowing you off?

FALL LOVE FORECAST

Carol Allen gives us the scoop on what the upcoming #VenusRetrograde means for your love life.

Get Carol’s compatibility report half off HERE using the offer code HALFOFF.

Join Damona’s community for free by taking your free e-course at DatesandMates.com

Follow Harry @CaldwellCrafted on IG

Follow Jasmine on IG @the_witchy_wonder and read her adventures jasmineseclipse.blogspot.com

Get your psychic reading from AskNow.com toll free at 877-626-1034

Yoga For Love & Textationships

Hello Lovers, Happy #NationalYogaAwarenessMonth!

This week Rebecca Benenati joins us to co-host a special episode dedicated to Yoga Awareness Month. Rebecca is a certified doula and yoga instructor who is Damona’s teacher and was also her doula in childbirth. Rebecca’s created a large community through Wellborn Lifestyles which offers birth support and soon also yoga classes in Los Angeles. Today Damona and Rebecca discuss how yoga can shift the way you date and improve your relationship:

D’S DATING DISH (2:21)

Does your partner have the seven qualities relationship experts say you need for a lasting relationship?

This week relationship experts told us the 7 Qualities Your Partner Should Have By The Time They’re 30. Do you really need to have these qualities by 30? How does your partner measure up? Damona and Rebecca have thoughts. 

Wiz Khalifa and Amber Rose give great co-parenting advice

Have you seen this video of Wiz brushing Sebastian’s hair? Great Parenting! Amber and Wiz’s relationship goes to show that you can co-parent after an ugly breakup. Damona and Rebecca discuss Amber Rose’s surprisingly simple co-parenting tip.

via GIPHY

Could your job be hurting your chances at finding love on Tinder?

Tinder has released the most right swiped professions in the US and the UK! Does Tinder think your job is sexy? Find out on today’s show.

YOGA FOR LOVE (17:46)

Damona and Rebecca give us an in depth look at the benefits of yoga for your love life:

  • How yoga can benefit your relationship
  • Getting started with couple yoga
  • Having Grace in a challenging situation
  • How to navigate finding love after divorce
  • How yoga helps women communicate with their partners

TECHNICALLY DATING (33:26)

Submit your questions Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook and hear our answers live on the show! Here are the topics we answered this week:

  • How to stop going for unavailable men and long-distance relationships?
  • How to meet someone special if you’re always working?
  • How to tell if someone likes you in a romantic way?

 

DAMONA’S DIATRIBE (41:50)

Are you stuck in a “textationship”? A textationship is a relationship that is essentially text only. Here’s the bad news: Textationships rarely move forward and actually hurt your chances of finding a real relationship. Damona gives us us some much needed tough love and honesty about how to move past your textationship.

Join Damona’s Community of Love by choosing your free e-course at DatesandMates.com and you’ll get access to the exclusive group coaching calls for Dates & Mates listeners.

Follow Damona on Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook

Rebecca Benenati on Instagram

Take your time back! Yoga misses you. Go to greenchef.us/datesandmates for $50 OFF your first box!

 

Single Moms & Summer Solstice

This week Damona got the chance to interview Rachel DeAlto, the relationship expert from the hit show Married at First Sight. She shared tips on flirting, dating after divorce, and more.

 

D’S DATING DISH (2:12)

Chris Pratt is dating The Governator’s daughter

Chris Pratt was recently spotted picking up Katherine Schwarzenegger for a romantic picnic, snapping shots of them all the while. The oldest daughter of Arnold and Maria Shriver, Katherine is an author and lifestyle blogger. Pratt split from wife Anna Faris in 2017, but seems to be ready to give love another shot. You can read more via Insider here.

Another new dating term for the summer

You know we like to keep our readers up-to-speed on the hottest new lingo, and we’ve got another one to keep your ears out for: freckling. Describing when you get involved with someone over the long, lazy summer nights but cut them out when it’s time to bring out the jackets come fall, you can read more via Independent here.

ABC’s creepy new dating show

The internet is a-blazin’ over The Proposal, ABC’s new reality dating show. A strange mix between The Dating Game and The Bachelor, contestants compete in “challenges” to “win” a proposal from an eligible bachelor or bachelorette live on air. The catch? They don’t meet them until the very end . . . You can read more via The Outline here.

TECHNICALLY DATING (32:40)

We pull the best questions posted on The Textpert App and those emailed to Damona, including:

  • The best way to go about long-distance love
  • If you can fall in love after a traumatic divorce

And many more . . .

HOLLYWOOD HOOKUP (44:54)

It’s Mary J. Blige’s turn for the Hollywood Hookup, as her divorce was finalized just last week. With a seeming preference for those in showbiz, we think she needs someone respectful, established, and mature. Listen to find out who Damona and Producer Thomas picked.

 

Get free shipping and free gifts at AdamandEve.com using the offer code GIFT21

DatesandMates.com has a free ecourse for single and coupled Dates & Mates listeners

Feng Shui for Love & Flirting at Work

Our guest co-host this week was Inessa Freylekhman, a Feng Shui Master Trainer and licensed therapist. Inessa gave us tips on how to bring the energy of love into our homes and amplify the passion in a relationship using Feng Shui principles.

 

INSPIRATIONAL THOUGHTS (2:16)

In this new segment, Damona will be sharing some words of inspiration to start our show off on a positive foot and hopefully brighten your week. Up this week was synchronicity: notice what is coming up in your life repeatedly, and be sure to ask yourself why.

D’S DATING DISH (4:36)

Bad relationships are literally bad for your health

A new study from Keck at USC shows that the results of a bad relationship affect far more than your emotional state. With everything from weight gain to high blood pressure to literal heart attacks, it’s time to take care of any toxicity in your personal relationships before you feel the negative effects. You can read more via Forbes here.

The key to losing weight as a couple

If you’ve tried and failed at losing weight alongside your partner, a new study may shine some light as to why. The environment in which you’re losing weight is key, and partners can occasionally not be on the same page in terms of the best methods of support and encouragement. You can read more via Science Daily here.

Will Smith wasn’t single when he got with Jada Pinkett Smith

Waves rippled through the Hollywood world when Jada Pinkett Smith revealed in a recent interview that her husband Will Smith was married to another woman when they met. Although the relationship was effectively over, not everyone was a fan of Smith shacking up with a technically taken man. You can read more via Elite Daily here.

TECHNICALLY DATING (37:25)

We pull the best questions posted on The Textpert App, including:

  • How to handle a co-worker that could be getting a little too flirty
  • How to tell your parents you’re bi
  • What to do if you can’t stop thinking about your ex with another man

And many more . . .

Get Feng Shui help: FengShuiFromtheHeart.com

Take a free dating or relationship course at DatesandMates.com

Try beach body for free for one month using the link on DatesandMates.com

Mixed Race Relationships & Swiping Risks

Our guest co-host this week was Monique DeBose. Monique is an award-winning, multi-talented playwright, singer, and star of the critically acclaimed show Mulatto Math: Summing Up the Race Equation in America. She joined us to talk about interracial relationships.

 

D’S DATING DISH (2:28)

Do swiping rewards outweigh the risk?

According to a new study published by the Pew Research Center, 45% of those who met via online dating apps believe it’s a more dangerous way of meeting people than traditional methods. But then again, 79% of those polled also admit it’s the most effective way of finding a partner. You can read more via Deseret News here.

Channing Tatum and Jenna Dewan split after nine years of marriage

The internet had its heart broken last week when Channing Tatum and Jenna Dewan announced their split. Though they publicly stated it was a tender separation, there may be more to the story . . . You can read more via People here.

Dishes are the chore killing your relationship

Women in heterosexual relationships reported that if they do the dishes the majority of the time, they’re less satisfied in their relationship. Couple who trade off dish duties or strike a “You cook, I clean” rule were much happier. You can read more via Esquire here.

TECHNICALLY DATING (34:01)

We pull the best questions posted on The Textpert App, including:

  • What to do if you don’t feel like a priority after six months of dating
  • What to do if you’re in love with your childhood best friend
  • How to handle a mom who doesn’t want you sleeping over at your boyfriend’s house

And many more . . .

DATING DOT DOT DOT (48:23)

We got Monique’s lightning fast love advice in another installment of Dating Dot Dot

  1. _________ is always sexy
  2. _________ is never sexy
  3. The biggest red flag on a dating profile is_________
  4. The most common first date mistake is _________
  5. The most important quality in a wife is_________.
  6. The most important quality in a husband is _________

Sexperts & Date Expectations

Our guest co-hosts this week were Tyomi Morgan-Najieb and Naim Najieb. Tyomi and Naim are life partners that work together to help couples with sex and love. Tyomi is an International Pleasure Coach and sexpert that aims to represent people of color in mainstream sexuality. Meanwhile, Naim is a love educator, entrepreneur, and author of the book Love Is Not a Game: A Manual for Loving Relationships.

 

D’S DATING DISH (2:19)

Dating app uses a team of moms to help its users with love

The dating app Inner Circle allows its users to get advice from a customer support team consisting of six moms, all of whom are married with children and believe that they’ve “conquered the dating game.” Users must be vetted by the team after analyzing social media profiles, but once you’re in, the moms will console you after breakups, give personalized tips on how to get more responses, and much more. You can read more via Mashable here.

Can you pick a partner based on voice?

A new app, Waving, has you swipe left and right based on a voice message. Men with lower voices and women with higher voices are typically found more attractive, but experts say that varying the tone of your voice is the most important. Nevertheless, some are skeptical that you can find love without an initial visual element. You can read more via Independent here.

Posture affects your results on dating apps

According to a Princeton study, expansive posture increases your success on dating apps. These kinds of stances suggest dominance and openness, which are seen as attractive. So for an easy boost in results, unfold those arms! You can read more via Independent here.

Vanessa Trump’s dating past

Vanessa Trump, soon to be Vanessa Hayden once the ink is dry on her divorce from Donald Trump Jr., was once attached to a Hollywood heartthrob. Sleuths have uncovered the fact that Vanessa was Leonardo DiCaprio’s beau in 1998 during the time Titanic came out. Though the publicist officially denied it at the time, several photos show them getting very cozy. You can read more via Elite Daily here.

TECHNICALLY DATING (34:42)

We pull the best questions posted on The Textpert App and BlackPeopleMeet.com, including:

  • What to do if the guy you just had sex with got back together with his girlfriend
  • How to feel about pets in the room while you’re having sex
  • What to do if you’re in it for love but he’s in it for sex

And many more . . .

DATING DOT DOT DOT (45:45)

We asked Tyomi and Naim for their lightning fast love advice in an installment of Dating Dot Dot Dot:

  • Who pays on a date?
  • Is it acceptable for a woman to be the breadwinner in a relationship?
  • Is it OK for a woman to propose?

Micro-Cheating & PTSAD

Our guest co-host this week was Carmelia Ray. Carmelia is an internationally acclaimed matchmaker for high achieving men and the quality women they’re searching for. She’s helped over 7,000 clients and is a renowned TV personality on shows such as Mom vs. Matchmaker and The Real Housewives of Toronto. Appearing in such publications as AskMen, Variety, and The Hollywood Reporter, clients can’t get enough of her “never settle” attitude and we were happy to welcome her on.

D’S DATING DISH (17:14)

New roundup of dating terms

We like to check in on dating slang every once in awhile, and we’ve got some new terms for you to keep an ear out for, including micro-cheating, catch and release, and the slow fade, in addition to some terms we’ve covered before such as breadcrumbing, ghosting, and love bombing. You can read more via FOX News here.

Drew Barrymore gives online dating a try

Barrymore has dreamed of a blind date since she was a little girl, but only recently drummed up the courage to give elite dating app Raya a try. Unfortunately, she didn’t meet with much success, and to make things worse, her ex-husband mentioned he was surprised to see her on the app even though she tried to delete her profile. You can read more via E! here.

A woman’s surprising way of celebrating a divorce

While many say that time heals all wounds, Briana Barksdale would beg to disagree. Barksdale recently held a garage sale where she sold all of the items she owns that remind her of her ex-husband, ending with her burning her wedding dress in front of the onlookers. You can read more via USA Today here.

TECHNICALLY DATING (33:11)

We pull the best questions posted on The Textpert App and BlackPeopleMeet.com, including:

  • How you should feel if your boyfriend went out with his friends on Valentine’s Day
  • What to do if you need to hack your boyfriend’s cellphone to prove he’s cheating
  • What to do if you’re in the military and learn your wife’s found another man

And many more . . .

DAMONA’S DIATRIBE (46:23)

It’s been awhile since Damona’s needed to blow off some steam, but this week we were treated to another diatribe. The topic? Love starting with you.

Get one week free at BlackPeopleMeet.com/datesandmates

Claim your free gift and get more dating advice at DatesandMates.com