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Body Confidence & Mojo Makeover

WOULD DATING BE EASIER IF WE WERE MORE BODY CONFIDENT?

Is it time you got your mojo back?

We get REAL on Dates & Mates this week. Damona says, “Some days I don’t feel great about my body. Maybe you can relate? But I figured that if I opened up and faced my true feelings about my body image, it might help you and I become more body positive together.”

We sat down with Dana B Meyers, the Queen of Mojo Makeovers, and Laurie DiBiasio, CEO of Babe You Lingerie, to talk about body confidence and self love.

This episode is all about:

  • Finding body confidence at every life stage or size
  • Building sensuality with another person
  • Spicing up your Love Life (don’t worry, it doesn’t get graphic and uncomfortable)

Here’s the rundown:

Damona’s Story (1:30)

Body Positivity is hard at any age

Your partner wants you to love your body as much as they do (7:30)

Stop deflecting compliments! (8:30)

Dana’s method to transforming NEGATIVE BODY BANTER into a SEXY SELF LOVE AFFIRMATION (9:45)

“If I just lost 10 pounds, I will find love” (16:00)

Building sensuality with another person (19:00)

Especially if you’ve been out of the game for a while or if you and your partner need to spice it up

Choose Babe You! With Laurie DiBiasio (33:00)

Why Lingerie should be visible (34:00)

The hourglass shape has historically been the most desirable shape (36:00)

Do things change when you see someone in a more intimate situation for the first time? (38:00)

We like feeling beautiful – not just for other people! (43:00)

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How To Flirt & Improv Games

DIDYA KNOW YOU CAN LEARN TO FLIRT?

Today, on my second episode in the Summer Love Series, I share 5 fun exercises that can improve your flirting game instantly.

If you followed my first TV series, #BlackLove, you might remember that I used improv techniques to teach the women how to flirt. Here’s a peek:

Flirting Coaching with Damona from Damona on Vimeo.

The show just showed the highlights, but on Dates & Mates today, you get the full experience of what a flirting coaching session with me is like.

For today’s demo I’m joined by two experienced improvisers Marquis Olison & Nicky Urban (whose improv group was just on America’s Got Talent last week.) With me, they demonstrate how improv can make flirting fun. I know it sounds CRAZY but I promise if you listen and try out some of the exercises, you flirt game will never be the same.

Here’s the rundown:

Why improv? (2:30)

How men can impress women in today’s world (5:30)

Yes, And (9:00)

What you can learn from Yes, And & How to replicate (12:00)

How to build energy on a date (13:30)

Accepting someone’s reality (17:00)

Mirroring & How to tell if someone is intelligent (18:30)

Embrace The Weird (23:00)

 

Missing this week’s headlines?  

Damona’s got you! Watch for Damona’s IGTV today for this week’s headlines on: All of the Hollywood Heartbreak this week (spoiler alert: lots of Hollywood exes made headlines), learning your dating app score, and how to stand out on dates in big cities. 

 

Dear Damona: DTR & Juggling Dates

DEAR DAMONA

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lately, we have been flooded with questions from the Dates & Mates community looking for all kinds of love and dating advice so we dedicated this week’s episode entirely to answering all of your questions! Evin Rose, Millennial Love Life & Dating Coach, returns this episode to help Damona really deep dive into your questions and give you their best advice. We talked about A LOT. Here’s the rundown:

(1:50) Should you tell your friend if his fiance is being manipulative?

Kayleigh from Facebook asks: Dear Damona – I have a friend who is madly in love with a girl from Spain. She is very obviously in not as into him and is definitely manipulative. Recently, she has been panicking about having to move back to Spain and not being able to work here without citizenship. My friend proposed to her because he loves her “so much” and is positive that he wants to marry her. Just from previous conversations I’ve had with her, I KNOW that she is not as into him and is using him to stay in the US. Should I say something to him?  

(4:27) Should you sleep with someone on a third date?

Dear Damona: So I was going on a 3rd date with a guy and the date was ok but since we had physical chemistry I didn’t mind just making out. Then he asked to do it to which I replied no. Then he says he’s not asking for a proposal and he feels rejected and how does he think it makes him feel to be rejected if I say no in the future. I said sleeping with someone too early usually makes them disappear and sure enough, he disappeared. Am I wrong to feel that his explanation is manipulative?

(8:30) If you have a good first date, should you stop talking to the other matches on your dating profile?

Lisa asks: I listen to your podcast and it is so helpful! I just recently started dating again and I’m just wondering what the proper protocol is regarding online dating. I went on a first date yesterday with a guy that I like and could have potential for a LTR. At the same time, I have several messages from other guys in my app that I want to explore. If I feel the person I had the date with had potential, should I stop communicating with other guys on the app? Thank you.

(10:42) When do you have that “Define the Relationship” talk?

(16:50) What is the deal with ghosting?

Jessica emails:What is going on with ghosting. In the last year I’ve been stood up for first dates, dropped after great 3rd dates, and generally treated like trash by the men in LA. I blame dating apps but I’m open to your interpretation. WTF please help!

LOOKING FOR THIS WEEK’S HEADLINES?

Don’t worry! We’ve got you. Damona keeps everyone up to date on this week’s dating headlines on Instagram. This week was a JUICY week for celebrity news. Follow Damona on Instagram (@DamonaHoffman) for the headlines including: did Prince William cheat on Kate? What’s up with Selena Gomez’s love life and Bumbles important new eggplant blocking feature.

 

 

ARE YOU MISSING ALL THE GOOD MATCHES ONLINE?

There are millions of people on dating apps worldwide. If you’re not finding love there, your profile may be the problem. Use Damona’s FREE guide to creating the ultimate MAGNETIC online dating profile. Get the Profile Starter Kit at profilestarterkit.com

Bedroom Confidence & Pleasure Positivity

WE’RE BRINGING SEXY BACK

via GIPHY

It’s been a tense couple of weeks for America, so we’re bringing sexy back with sex and relationship coach, Caitlin V. Caitlin joines us the week to get real about bedroom confidence, good sex, and being pleasure positive. Here’s the rundown:

D’S DATING DISH (2:39)

Dating advice from JLO

According to JLO, men are useless until they’re 33. According to Dr. Jane Greer, men like to be established before they settle down and they take time to mature in their 20s. So JLO might be right but Damona has thoughts.

via GIPHY

What dating app is most popular in your area?

New data from SimpleTexting shows that the most popular dating app varies state by state. It was no surprise that Match is most popular across the board and Tinder is second most popular. However there were some surprises! Texas, we see you.

via GIPHY

How parents can improve their relationships

The secret to a new happy family: paternity leave. Studies show that long periods of paternity directly correlate with mothers’ reports of relationship satisfaction and lower relationship conflict. Have you had this experience? Tweet Damona and let her know.

BEDROOM CONFIDENCE & PLEASURE POSITIVITY (15:34)

via GIPHY

 This week we took a cue from Samantha, the OG pleasure positive Guru, and sat down with Caitlin V – a sex and relationship coach who helps men become amazing lovers and incredible partners. Caitlin is a former sexual health researcher and policy analyst, turned overnight YouTube sensation. She works with clients all over the world on developing unshakable confidence, sex skills, and intimacy. Combining personal experience with evidence-based science in her coaching, Caitlin’s mission is to create a pleasure-positive world. We talked about A LOT:

  • What does Pleasure Positive mean?
  • How is Pleasure positive difference from sex positive
  • The Sixth Sense
  • What is good sex?
  • How to spice up your sex life
  • Allowing yourself to be sexual
  • How the overuse of Porn is affecting men & women in the bedroom
  • Premature Ejaculations & Performance Anxiety
  • Practice how you play
  • What is a sex coach and who should work with one?

Visit Caitlin’s YouTube or follow her on Instagram for more helpful content on bedroom confidence.

TECHNICALLY DATING (36:02)

Submit your questions Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook and hear our answers live on the show! Here’s what our listeners asked about this week:

  • What does casually dating mean on Tinder?
  • What to do when your boyfriend sends you mixed signals.. in bed.
  • Should you warn your dates if you weigh more than the pictures they see in your profile?

DAMONA’S DIATRIBE (46:45)

You want a guy who looks like he can chop wood? But do you actually need any wood chopped? Damona closes the show with a diatribe about seeking qualities in a mate that you don’t need.

STAY SEXY THIS HOLIDAY SEASON

On average people gain 2-5 lbs over the holidays. You can fight to get it off in January or you can stop the holiday heaviness before it starts by beginning a program with BeachBody on demand. Just go to DatesandMates.com and click the Beach Body Banner to get started.

 

What Women Want & Seeking Arrangement

Are you confused about what women want?

Evin Rose, dating and love life transformation coach for millennial women, co-hosts this week’s episode of Dates & Mates. Last week, we dove deep into the mind of men and figured out what the guys are really thinking. Now it’s the ladies’ turn! Today Damona and Evin sit down with a panel of single women to figure out what women really want. Here’s the rundown:

D’S DATING DISH

Why is it so hard to turn a Tinder date into a relationship?

Research from Michigan State University indicates that couples who meet online are 28% more likely to split up within a year. What makes these relationships different? What expectations should we have for Tinder dates? Damona and Evin discuss.

Put your best foot forward

Picking a first date outfit can be a lot of pressure. This week, MamaM!a published a few suggestions for your first date outfit. Damona and Evin give you some suggestions on how to show off your personality.

Are sugar babies bad for feminism?

SeekingArrangement now has over 3 million users worldwide and the numbers are growing. The average Sugar Baby is 25 and makes about 2800 a month from her Daddies. What are the biggest misconceptions about Sugar Baby and Sugar Daddy/Mommy relationships? Are these relationships actually empowering for Sugar Babies? Damona and Evin have thoughts.

 

WHAT A GIRL WANTS

Last week, the men told us what really goes on in their head. This week, the ladies got a turn. Today we sat down with Rebecca Bernard and Nelly Dennis to get some answers on what women really want. Here’s what we covered:

  • Men on dating apps & the riffraffery
  • The worst DMs
  • Do you right swipe when you see someone you know?
  • What do you do when married men proposition you?
  • Pick Up Lines
  • Courtship & Chivalry
  • Should women make the first move?
  • Who pays on the first date?

You know the drill, fellas. They’re single, ready to mingle, and open for DMs. (Please, no dick pics, thanks.)

 

TECHNICALLY DATING  

Submit your questions Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook and hear our answers live on the show! Here are the topics we answered this week:

  • Should you tell your dates that you’re seeing other people?
  • How do you ask your partner for a threesome?
  • How to get over anxiety over asking women out.

DAMONA’S DIATRIBE

This week we remember Mac Miller and send condolences to his family, friends, and Ariana Grande. Today on Damona’s diatribe, Damona has a message for those who are in relationships with a person struggling with addiction.

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Join Damona’s Community of Love by choosing your free e-course at DatesandMates.com and you’ll get access to the exclusive group coaching calls for Dates & Mates listeners.

Follow Damona on Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook

Follow Evin Rose on Instagram @EvinRose, join her FREE Empowered Dating Community on @EmpoweredDatingwithEvinRos or visit her site evinrosecoaching.com

Find Rebecca and Nelly on Instagram – DMs from smart, serious guys only – haha!

 

Super Mamas & Relationship Standards

Super Mamas Podcast host Paulina Lopez and guest co-host psychotherapist Rhonda Richards-Smith join Damona to discuss how moms can still be sexy to their husbands. Rhonda takes on the headlines including: How dating apps have affected the rate of STDs, Aziz Ansari’s comedy in the #MeToo era, and how your relationship standards change once you’re couple up. Questions from listeners include: how to avoid strange requests on dating apps, should you see your ex again, and is it ok for your man to DM an instagram model?

 

D’S DATING DISH (4:21)

Dating apps blamed for rise in STDs

STDs are on the rise, with five times as many cases seen in the past four months when compared with the same time period last year. Apps such as Tinder and Bumble are facing blame, with syphilis being the STD increasing the most rapidly. You can read more via NY Post here.

Aziz Ansari returns to standup with dating routine

Both Aziz Ansari and Louis C.K. returned to standup this week after being implicated in the #MeToo movement. Ansari avoided mention of the accusations against him, despite the fact the set was structured around dating. Is this tasteless? Can he make a comeback? You can read more via NME here.

How your relationship standards change

A new study proves that your relationship expectations change before and after you enter a relationship. It proved that those who took the survey while in a relationship ranked their current partner closer to their ideal than those who took the survey single and entered into a relationship a few months later. You can read more via Bustle here.

TECHNICALLY DATING (38:35)

We pull the best questions posted on The Textpert App, including:

  • How to avoid strange messages on dating apps
  • If it’s OK to see your ex again

And many more . . .

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Join the list to get invited to Damona’s private coaching calls at DatesandMates.com. Register for your free dating or relationship e-course Relationship Bootcamp or The Texting 10 Commandments to subscribe.

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Follow Rhonda on IG

Check out the Super Mamas Podcast and follow Paulina on IG @iampaulinalopez

Summer Date Ideas & FWB Feelings

We’re so excited to be back! On our return episode, International Matchmaker Jessica Fass joined Damona in studio along with Producer J to share great summer date ideas to heat things up in love while the weather is still warm. Headlines include: harsh criticism for The Bachelor and dating shows in the era of #MeToo, what your date’s texting habits mean, and Facebook’s new dating app. Plus questions from listeners like what do you do if you are catching feelings for a friend with benefits (FWB) and how you can get a $1000 loan back from someone you broke up with.

 

D’S DATING DISH (3:36)

What can you tell about your date from their texting habits?

On average, millennials reach out to their date within two days after a date ends if they’re interested in pursuing things further. This checks out, as 89% of single women say they want to be contacted within that time frame. That age-old adage of the three-day rule has fallen by the wayside, with only six percent of single ladies still holding by it. You can read more via Elite Daily here.

Is it time to retire dating shows in the #MeToo era?

The Bachelor and Bachelorette have changed, with unceremonious dumping and accusations of contestants being sex offenders; that’s not even to mention the mess that is the recent show The Proposal. In the #MeToo era, are these examples of entertainment outdated? Perhaps the combination of alcohol, producer pressure, and exploitation should no longer be considered viable. You can read more via USA Today here.

Facebook has started internal testing of its dating app

Two months after announcing its launch, Facebook has begun testing its dating app among its employees. US Facebook employees currently have access to the beta, although the company has asked them to make fake profiles that will be deleted upon public launch. You can read more via The Verge here.

TECHNICALLY DATING (33:46)

We pull the best questions posted on The Textpert App and those emailed to Damona, including:

  • How to handle a friends with benefits situation
  • How to deal with an ex who owes you a sizable sum of money

And more . . .

HOLLYWOOD HOOKUP (46:51)

In this segment, we brainstorm as to who would best fit a celebrity looking for love. Up this week was Selena Gomez. Tune in to see who we think she should be looking out for!

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Love Addiction & Dating Intuition

Our guest co-host this week was psychotherapist and life coach Sherry Gaba. She joined us to talk about her latest book, in addition to giving us tips on how to kick an addiction to love.

 

D’S DATING DISH (4:05)

Dating lowers self-esteem and increases depressions

In addition to the scientific fact that rejection stimulates the part of the brain that processes physical pain, online dating can also affect how we see ourselves. A recent study shows that individuals who use dating apps have lower self-esteem than those who don’t. Coupled with the fact that one in six participants admitted to being addicted to finding a date, 97% of men saying as much, and that 54% of women feel burned out by the whole thing, online dating and mental health may not be the best of friends. You can read more via CNN here.

Millennial couples are in no hurry to get hitched

If they millennial couples make it to the altar at all, they’re taking their sweet time! Nowadays it’s not uncommon to spend the better part of a decade dating before tying the knot, with the average time between 25-34-year-olds now at 6.5 years. The median age for men is now 29.5, with 27.4 for women. You can read more via Straits Times here.

Hip hop royalty dating rumors

Eminem and Nicki Minaj are looking like they may be an item, with a flirty Instagram comment making reference to the coupling, in addition to Em asking audiences at recent concerts how they’d feel about it. They’ve paired together in the studio before, do you think they can be a match in real life? You can read more via FOX News here.

TECHNICALLY DATING (30:08)

We pull the best questions posted on The Textpert App and those emailed to Damona, including:

  • What to do if your dating pool has shrunk after 50
  • What to do if you find compromising photos on your husband’s phone
  • How to react if you find out your boyfriend was abusive to an ex

And many more . . .

DAMONA’S DIATRIBE (45:27)

Every once in awhile Damona gets a little riled up, and this week she saw fit to square up and face complainers head on.

Take the love addiction quiz at SherryGaba.com

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Mixed Race Relationships & Swiping Risks

Our guest co-host this week was Monique DeBose. Monique is an award-winning, multi-talented playwright, singer, and star of the critically acclaimed show Mulatto Math: Summing Up the Race Equation in America. She joined us to talk about interracial relationships.

 

D’S DATING DISH (2:28)

Do swiping rewards outweigh the risk?

According to a new study published by the Pew Research Center, 45% of those who met via online dating apps believe it’s a more dangerous way of meeting people than traditional methods. But then again, 79% of those polled also admit it’s the most effective way of finding a partner. You can read more via Deseret News here.

Channing Tatum and Jenna Dewan split after nine years of marriage

The internet had its heart broken last week when Channing Tatum and Jenna Dewan announced their split. Though they publicly stated it was a tender separation, there may be more to the story . . . You can read more via People here.

Dishes are the chore killing your relationship

Women in heterosexual relationships reported that if they do the dishes the majority of the time, they’re less satisfied in their relationship. Couple who trade off dish duties or strike a “You cook, I clean” rule were much happier. You can read more via Esquire here.

TECHNICALLY DATING (34:01)

We pull the best questions posted on The Textpert App, including:

  • What to do if you don’t feel like a priority after six months of dating
  • What to do if you’re in love with your childhood best friend
  • How to handle a mom who doesn’t want you sleeping over at your boyfriend’s house

And many more . . .

DATING DOT DOT DOT (48:23)

We got Monique’s lightning fast love advice in another installment of Dating Dot Dot

  1. _________ is always sexy
  2. _________ is never sexy
  3. The biggest red flag on a dating profile is_________
  4. The most common first date mistake is _________
  5. The most important quality in a wife is_________.
  6. The most important quality in a husband is _________

Married at First Sight & Relationship Rituals

Our guest co-host this week was Rhonda Richards-Smith. Rhonda is an award-winning psychotherapist and relationship expert whose advice has been featured everywhere from the Huffington Post to Teen Vogue to US Weekly. But that’s not all! We also had a very special appearance from Pastor Calvin of the reality show Married at First Sight.

D’S DATING DISH (2:55)

Duke looks to change its dating policy

Up until now, Duke University has given its blessing to relationship between students and teachers as long as the student is not currently enrolled in the professor’s class, working on a research project with them, or being mentored by them. However, it’s a sign of the times that the Academic Council is now looking to shake things up. You can read more via Herald Sun here.

Which Olympic athletes are hooking up the most?

Bumble is proving popular at this year’s Olympic games, and the details are in regarding who is taking advantage of the event for a different kind of physical activity. Which sport has the athletes that are getting it on the most? You can find out via TMZ here.

Amy Schumer ties the knot

Schumer’s only been dating chef Chris Fischer for a few months, but they recently made things official in a small ceremony in Malibu this past weekend. It was a low-key event with only around 80 in attendance, but the couple seem happy and we wish them all the best. You can read more via Huffington Post here.

TECHNICALLY DATING (37:59)

We pull the best questions posted on The Textpert App and BlackPeopleMeet.com, including:

  • How to handle a husband liking some old flame’s posts on social media
  • What to do when your best friend is dating your ex
  • What to do if you’re depressed over a breakup

And many more . . .

Dates & Mates

Date for a Soulmate & Valentine’s Day

Our guest co-hosts this week were Orna and Matthew Walters, soulmate coaches for spiritual, successful, and single women who have everything . . . except the man of their dreams. Their breakthrough coaching program, Bring In Your Beloved, helps its practitioners remove blocks to love so you can love yourself and others more deeply. Love coaches who are actually in love, we were lucky enough to have them stick around to give our listeners some advice in Technically Dating after our interview.

D’S DATING DISH (3:10)

A guide to having “the talk” with the person you’re dating

We’ve all been in the position of dreading “the talk,” but luckily, the Washington Post has published a guide to hold your hand through the process. The key points are to remember to never force things and to make your intentions clear from the start, but you can read more via the link above.

The new rules for workplace romance

Facebook recently revealed their workplace dating policies, and thankfully, everyone was in agreement that they’re pretty fair! The big kicker? You only have one shot to ask a coworker out. If they reject you, it’s harassment if you ask them again. You can read more via Gizmodo here.

A surprising celebrity breakup

Alas, another Hollywood couple has bitten the dust. Sarah Silverman and boyfriend Michael Sheen called it quits over Christmas break and are just now making the news official. However, Sarah is keeping her trademark sense of humor about it, and we’re rooting for her as always. You can read more via ET here.

TECHNICALLY DATING (32:58)

We pull the best questions posted on The Textpert App and BlackPeopleMeet.com, including:

  • Good ideas for Valentine’s Day if you’re single
  • How to handle a younger wife who’s getting attention from other men
  • How to tell someone you need space

And many more . . .

Get 1 week free at BlackPeopleMeet.com/datesandmates