It’s January, and if there’s one thing we have heard more times than we can count this month, it’s the familiar chant of “New Year, New Me.” Now, you’ve probably heard Damona say it over the years too, but while we fully embrace self-improvement and growth, they should be a year-round focus, rather than an annual one.

That being said, we know that many of you are in that space right now, ready to make a change. So here to help us form new habits and keep them is speaker and best-selling author, Rainie Howard. She’ll be outlining the steps to creating change and and she’ll tell us the signs that you may be in need of a change, even if you don’t realize it right now.

But first, we have the Dating Dish this week, and it is spicy! There is a new hot dating site and you will never guess what it is!

 

Dating Dish (2:00)

Alright, take a seat because we’re delving into the latest buzz on the dating scene! Business Insider spills the beans that the unexpected star of the dating game is none other than LinkedIn. Yes, you heard that right. 

LinkedIn, the professional networking platform, is apparently doubling up as a rendezvous spot. People are blending business with pleasure and the DM feature is playing a significant role in turning it into a potential dating arena.

But tread carefully when venturing into professional inboxes. While LinkedIn brings credibility, using it as a dating platform raises eyebrows. 

Now, for those considering a business connection that could turn into more, here’s a LinkedIn DM tip: Keep the initial message professional but relevant. In the slower pace of LinkedIn, no need to rush the first comment on a post. Show genuine interest without diving into personal territory too soon. Go slow and stay open to unexpected connections! 

Rainie Howard (11:40)

Introducing Rainie Howard, a powerhouse in the realm of inspiration! She wears many hats – a sought-after speaker, a Best Selling Author, and a life coach. With a repertoire that includes impactful books like “Addicted to Pain” and “You Are Enough,” Rainie spreads her empowering messages not just through her writings but also as the host of “The Rainie Howard Show” podcast.

(12:26) How Do We Create Change?

Embarking on a fresh perspective, Rainie unfolds insights into personal transformation, challenging the conventional “new year, new me” narrative. Rather than externalizing goals of love and relationships, she advocates for embodying the qualities one desires in a friend and lover. Rainie’s approach involves radiating self-love, sparking a natural attraction – a brilliant shift in perspective.

Rainie underscores the importance of aligning actions with the desired character. Addressing the common pitfall of overwhelming to-do lists, she recommends prioritizing and focusing on one thing at a time for enduring change. Her advice? “Zero in on those small daily changes that lay the foundation for long-lasting results and stay grounded in realism about how we’re going to make it happen.”

 (15:45) Better Boundaries in 2024

Exploring the quest for improved boundaries, the discussion delves into a common aspiration shared by many. The prevalent issue of recovering people pleasers takes center stage, highlighting the necessity of learning valuable lessons from past relationships. 

Emphasizing the importance of taking time and setting protective boundaries, the conversation offers insights into avoiding the pitfalls of rushing into relationships without thoughtful analysis.

Damona echoes this sentiment, endorsing the concept of slow love and dating. She underscores the significance of stepping back during the in-between moments to assess feelings without getting caught up in momentum. 

The conversation underscores the need to be present and mindful in the unfolding of relationships, emphasizing the value of boundaries to protect oneself from potential hurt. 

 (18:50) Is This Relationship Toxic?

Navigating the intricacies of relationships, the conversation takes a glance ahead, exploring potential signs of toxicity. Rainie urges a keen focus on the emotions the relationship evokes, from walking on eggshells to subtle disrespect. Toxicity, she suggests, isn’t always overt; it can manifest in demeaning words that leave one questioning their worth.

In a follow-up, Damona digs into Rainie’s expertise on addiction to pain, as featured in her book “Addicted to Pain.” The discussion unveils a nuanced perspective, acknowledging a collective tendency to tolerate certain levels of pain. 

Rainie shares examples where individuals may accept disrespectful behavior or infidelity, inadvertently allowing patterns of pain. The exchange reveals a cycle of seeking highs and lows in relationships, akin to a dopamine-driven journey. Rainie advocates for breaking free from this cycle and for the pursuit of healthier connections.

(23:07) Rainie Shares Her Goals for 2024

Sharing aspirations for the year ahead, the conversation turns to personal goals, resolutions, dreams, hopes, and wishes for 2024. Rainie expresses excitement about her upcoming book, highlighting the goal of bringing it to life and connecting with readers. Beyond that, her perpetual focus is on self-improvement, currently honing the art of listening in various aspects of life, from conversations to business meetings.

Rainie introduces her engagement with the slow living movement, emphasizing the value of taking time for oneself and approaching projects with ease. Rather than succumbing to stress and overwhelm, she embraces a mindset of breathing through challenges and acknowledging that not everything needs to be figured out instantly. 

Rainie’s journey includes morning meditations which foster a deeper connection to her intuition and spirituality. These intentional practices reflect her commitment to personal growth in the year ahead.

 

Dear Damona (25:37)

Submit your questions on Instagram, X, TikTok or Facebook and hear Damona’s answers live on a future all-Dear Damona episode!

• Instagram DM from E: Dear Damona, How do you know when you’ve been ghosted? And what do you recommend as a response? What if that person messages after some time has passed?