Great Date Ideas (that don’t break the bank)

BALLIN’ ON A BUDGET?

Looking to impress someone without spending a lot of money but don’t want to look like a cheapskate?  Here are a few suggestions on how to have a cheap date without looking like one:

DINNER

There are many websites where you can get discounts if you plan ahead. On restaurant.com you can purchase gift certificates for less than their printed value.  How to settle the bill without looking like a bargain-hunter? Tell your date you have to use the restroom, grab the check, and take care of it while you’re up.   Then you’ll seem like someone who knows how to handle business efficiently and they will still feel taken care of, even if it cost you 15% less.

CULTURE

Many museums have “free days” where you can enter at no cost.  Usually, it’s a little busier than other days but that just means your date will have to snuggle up close to you to get to see the exhibit.  You don’t have to tell them that you knew about the free day just say “Hey, want to go to the modern art museum on Wednesday.” Play it off as a surprise, whatever you need to do but as long as it doesn’t seem pre-meditated.  Sometimes these museums take donations instead of charging a specific amount. Even if you give a “generous” $10 donation you’ll still pay less than admission for two but you’ll look like a philanthropist…very sexy.

BARS

A lot of bars have adjusted happy hours to go later or run on the weekends.  Research which places in your area have happy hour during a date-appropriate time and get yourself a reservation.  If the place is busy, it’ll just seem popular and you’ll have to get closer together to hear one another.

OUTDOORS

Emphasize how into fitness and/or the outdoors you are and invite them to go on a hike with you.  After the hike you can surprise your date with a pre-packed picnic basket and blanket and turn the day into a romantic outdoor retreat.

You don’t have to spend a lot of money to make a good impression.  Effort should win over dollars spent any day.

The Phases of Dating During COVID

SAFE ONLINE DATING IN 2020 AND 2021

Since I began my practice, there have been only two major disruptors to the online dating process that have required me to modify my approach: Tinder and COVID. 

Online dating was always one of my favorite mediums for singles to meet but Tinder and the apps that followed made online dating accessible to all and forever impacted the dating landscape. 

COVID has changed everything about how to date online, use the apps, and filter for matches. Today, the number one question I hear is: “How does dating during COVID work?” Luckily for daters, the stages of dating in 2020 have stayed the same, but the way we navigate them could be a little different.

These are the phases in online dating in 2020 and 2021:

Phase 1: Online Matching and Introduction

The speed of swiping is still just as quick as before but I find that daters are slower to move on to in-person dating in the pandemic as they take time to assess someone’s dating risk.

Phase 2: Texting/Messaging

This stage, which used to drag on for weeks or months, is truncated now because a call or video date is less risky than a traditional date. Before, people had to weigh the value proposition of an in-person date based on the investment of time and money. Now that those factors are removed, there is less pressure on this decision and singles are speeding through this part of the process.

Phase 3: The Phone Call

I have been a long-time advocate of the phone call prior to the first date. It is impossible to tell compatibility over text, yet before now, many people were skipping the phone call in favor of speed and efficiency. Now phone calls have once again become an accepted phase in the dating process as a lead up to a video chat or social distance date. 

For my clients who are nervous about giving out their phone number, I recommend downloading the TextNow App which gives you a free alternative number that will ring to your primary phone. That way if you ever change your mind about a match, you can change your number safely and easily and keep it moving.

Phase 4: Social Distance Date

Once you have talked on the phone or video chatted, you will need to meet up in person to see if the connection is real within a month or less. Most catfish situations come up when the daters have never connected off the app so I encourage clients to move offline as soon as it feels safe and comfortable.

For months, singles have waited for things to return to normal. So if you ever wondered how to date online in the middle of a world-wide pandemic AND election year, my answer is: it’s a lot like the old model of online dating with more precaution.

Now, more than ever, those who are uncoupled have felt the weight of their decision to stay single or the frustration of being unable to find a suitable partner. However, we are in the new normal and dating will not return to the old model anytime in the foreseeable future.

The positive side of this shift is that it has slowed down the filtering phase. What had become a rapid-fire round of swiping directly to a date and the inevitable ghosting that followed has been replaced by more mindful conversations and meaningful phone calls and video chats.

Ultimately, you have to create your own safety plan for dating in the time of Coronavirus but if you move offline quickly, I recommend downloading the TextNow App to communicate safely then meet up in a COVID-safe environment, you can still find love in today’s world.

 


This blog is sponsored by TextNow. The app solves many major challenges that my clients face in dating today:

  • You can keep your main number private
  • You can separate your personal and dating contacts
  • Plus, It’s easy to use and FREE.

I’m proud to collaborate with an app that empowers modern daters to feel safe and secure. If you want more information, check out my video when to give out your number to people you meet on dating apps. Click here!

Damona’s Algorithm Hacks!

Here are a few key tips on making the algorithm work for you from today’s episode of the Dates & Mates Podcast!

  1. Sign on regularly – daily if you can. If you have notifications turned off you will miss communications plus logging in less frequently tells the app you’re not that engaged and bumps you lower in the search when others are looking for someone like you. 
  2. Initiate messages and swipe liberally – if you don’t swipe or message anyone, the app can’t tell who you want to engage with and will keep matching you more broadly with people you might not actually connect with or find attractive. 
  3. Switch it up – making changes to your profile on regular intervals every month or so means you’re going to the top of the queue regularly 

CLICK HERE TO GET YOUR FREE ALGORITHM HACKS FROM DAMONA!

4 Binge Worthy Dates & Mates Episodes

New To The Dates & Mates Podcast and Damona Hoffman? Here’s Where You Start

Episode 300: A Master Class on the Future of Dating

In this Master Class, Damona covers:

  • How to survive the disappearance of dating apps
  • The ONE THING you must do before you start a relationship
  • The gender roles of tomorrow and how to prepare for this shift
  • How to diversify your dating pool now
  • and so much more!

Read the full blog recap here!

 

Episode 307: Tall Guy Vibe & Keeping It Cute


In the most recent episode of Dates & Mates, Damona tackles the “height question”: should height really matter in dating today? Hot Take: Height is irrelevant in today’s world because physical traits no longer signal to women the biological need to feel provided for. Controversial, we know! Damona also gets a guy’s opinion on what pet peeves men really have in dating.

Read the full blog recap here!

 

Episode 290: A Master Class on How To Change Bad Dating Habits


Damona shows you how to fix your these bad dating habits:

  • Ghosting – no one wants to be ghosted but almost everyone does it – then we make excuses for why that person didn’t deserve our time or the respect of a real response
  • Obligaswiping – Do you have a dating app installed on your phone right now that you hate? 
  • First Date Fails
    • No pre-dating 
    • Not showing up your best 
  • The Set it and Forget it profile
  • The Texting Trap – Texting is not a chemistry builder, it’s a chemistry blocker.
  • Being afraid of starting over 
  • Negative self talk – What is that phrase that is playing over and over again in your mind about why you’re still single? 
  • Lack of a plan – Are you buying into the myth that love is meant to find you?

Read the full blog here!

Episode 275: A Comprehensive Guide to Dating Apps


TOP 5 Dating App Problems

  • The Profile Problem
  • The Pickiness Problem
  • The Sit Back & Wait Problem
  • The Dating Pool Problem
  • The Dating Strategy Problem

PLUS, did you know that the latest studies on the marriage market show that there is a shortage of men with marriageable qualities?

Damona covers this study published in the Journal of Marriage & Family  and gives you the rundown and goes in-depth on:

  • Are you pricing yourself out of the marriage market?
  • What men and women can learn from this data
  • How to solve your marriage market problems

Dates & Mates is a wealth of information! Are there any topics you want us to discuss on the podcast? Let Damona Know! You can DM her on all the socials @DamonaHoffman OR join our exclusive Patreon!

This is a way to connect on a deeper level and for you to get more personalized support from Damona on your love life.

What is Patreon?

Patreon is a platform that allows you to support creators like me to keep making helpful content that you want to hear and allow you to get amazing listener benefits by participating

Our page is Patreon.com/datesandmates

Sign up at patreon.com/datesandmates for: 

  • an opportunity to work with Damona directly
  • to get quality advice that is tailored to your dating challenges
  • and to become part of a community that will help you find the healthiest, most loving relationships this year