Did you know that the traditional gift for a 17th wedding anniversary is furniture? Damona says it’s perfect timing because she and her wonderful husband Seth are celebrating 17 years of marriage this week and they desperately need a new couch.

Why furniture you might ask? Well, some say it represents the security, comfort and familiarity of a marriage that has lasted almost 20 years. 

Funny enough, Damona compares a successful relationship to a table in her book, F The Fairy Tale. She says, “Think of a relationship like a table. If it’s built with a solid foundation, it can stand for years…You can build a table with only three legs, but it probably won’t last as long as one with four. And what will happen when you put something heavy on it?..”

In the end, a foundation built on the 4 pillars – goals, values, communication and trust – creates the space for a successful relationship future and the ability to overcome challenges. Grab a copy of Damona’s book F The Fairy Tale: Rewrite the Dating Myths and Live Your Own Love Story to learn more.

But enough of the past, let’s look ahead to the future. While she has been doing this work for over a decade, Damona still finds herself consumed by curiosity about where dating and relationships are headed. Recently, it dawned on her that the future of dating is sitting in her home, her daughter Addie.

And so, this week, we’re welcoming Damona’s teenage daughter, Addie Hoffman to Dates & Mates. She will be giving a , to give the Gen Z perspective on dating – and it’s surprisingly relatable to daters of all ages. 

 

But first we have the Dating Dish.

DATING DISH (4:23)

A New York Times article about tells the stories of five couples who married, divorced and then married their ex-spouses again. 

We thought this would be rare, but a study published in the Journal of Divorce and Remarriage estimated the number of people who remarry their ex spouse is actually about 10%.

Damona highlights some of her favorite stories of remarriage and shares some of her top takeaways.

ADDIE HOFFMAN (12:18)

Addie Hoffman is Damona’s 13-year-old daughter. This is Addie’s very first podcast appearance, but you can see her TV debut on America’s Funniest Videos on April 14th, and you’ll probably see her on stage at a comedy show in 10 years!

Addie identifies as cis-het and attends an all girls school.

(13:53) The Dating Life of a Young Gen Z 

At age 13, she is still a little young for dating, but Addie shares that she has some interest and wonders where she might meet future dates. 

Damona asks Addie where her friends have met their dates. “Most people find them in their extracurricular classes, but it’s hard because what if you don’t like anyone that does the sport you do?” 

(15:36) What Addie’s Learned From Damona & Seth

Damona asks Addie what she has learned from her parent’s relationship, so Addie shares a story about the family preparing for an event. It seems laughter is key!

When asked for another lesson, Addie jokes about mutual care. “If I have a partner who can rub my feet, or Theragun my back, we set!”

(18:07) Designing your dating destiny 

Damona says that when she was Addie’s age, she had already been sold the fairy. She recounts how she would write her name next to her crush’s last name. 

Damona asks Addie if she has considered marriage and kids saying that today’s daters don’t have to toe that line. 

Addie replies, “I think I would like to have kids and marriage. That sounds really weird coming out of my mouth. I’ve thought about it, but I’ve never said it.”

 

DEAR DAMONA (19:31)

Submit your questions on Instagram, X, TikTok, or Facebook, and hear Damona’s answers live in a future episode!

In this unique take on Dear Damona, Damona answers questions from Addie and her teenage friends about dating: 

• If you don’t think a person is a good match for your friend, is it okay to tell them they should break up?
• How can you tell if someone is attracted to you?
• How do you break up with someone if you know that you don’t have feelings for them anymore?